Delayed "Dead Island" Impressions.

With the launch of "Gear of War 3" I've fallen behind on my "Dead Island" review.  So here is my impressions of "Dead Island" until my finished review officially goes up.

It has awful gameplay, awful story, awful voice acting, but it's SO much f*cking fun!

My "House of the Dead" review from 2003 returns from the grave.

Last night while I was playing around, working on some design work and new ideas for my site here (which I'm planning on changing up here very soon), I was watching some Netflix streaming.  and happened to stumble across this little jem.  This is a review that I wrote on Netflix for 2003's "House of the Dead" directed by Uwe Boll.  I completely forgot I wrote this and decided I would share it here with you all.  Enjoy.

It's not very often when you watch a zombie movie and root for the zombies to kill the heroes faster just so the movie will just end. This movie should enough reason as to why Uwe Boll should never direct a movie again, and why David Richardson shouldn't be within a 100 mile radius of editing software.  I know this movie is based off a SEGA video game (and believe me they make sure you know by displaying the SEGA logo on huge banners through-out the movie) but explain to me why you would mix shots and scenes directly from the F*cking video game into the actual movie,?!?!  When I fist heard this I thought it was some kind of a joke; but it seriously happens. It's not like the movie Doom where they shoot 11 minutes from a first person perspective to give you a feel of the video game. No Uwe Boll must have realized that he was running out of reels and needed filler to make his atrocity longer.  There's horrible acting, god awful action sequences, and one of the most anticlimactic endings to grace the silver screen. The only redeeming part of this movie is you see Erica Durance's breasts in the first 10 min of the movie. After that you can turn the movie off and stare at a wall for an hour and thirty minutes while a midget head-buts you in testicles repeatedly cause I promise that will be more entertaining than watching this garbage.